As much as we dread about the worst nightmare knocking our door every month, we have also accepted it to be part of our lives, without ignoring them. They come, raid you with the stupefying pain, they conquer and finally say you “goodbye” along with a special message “We are coming to haunt you again till then enjoy your life”.
We as a majority go through this trauma of menstruation days, but god has blessed those small population of women who are immune to all of this more or less and trust me I find them the luckieeesttt!! How I wish I could simply exchange my ovaries with them and feel like a superwoman with superpowers indeed! Considering the agony surrounding this whole matter, here are range of things we ladies are bound to do, think or go through when the red warrior hits us
The P factor
Yes, periods don’t care if we have a wedding to attend or have a planned beach vacation the next day. They have their own protocol to be followed meaning, targeting to bombard us with more and more cramp bombs, till we enter the dungeon of torture.
Hog, Hog and burst!
You start becoming a walking food processor and can literally gobble, gulp everything coming around your sight. Pounding on giant milkshakes, succulent desserts, cheesy pizzas and burgers to eventually fall into food coma to later find out the weighing scales not pitying you enough. Because mindlessly eating is the only agenda left on the mind!
Giving your Sesh’s big miss!
This is the best excuse we all have to ditch the workout sessions and few more other if you know what I mean. The thought to suppress one pain over another by doing lunges or just moonwalking on the treadmill is just a myth, so just relax on your couch and overthink like there is no tomorrow. *that’s so being sadist*
Brain does the rains
This area of our anatomy never fails to disappoint us ladies, yeah the topmost floor of our building: headquartered at the right place, sending us through a wide range of emotions, mostly wicked ones. When was the last time you acted like a bitch and didn’t empathise the girl who lost her puppy, well to be precise you are badass and over spilling with sweetness simultaneously, while the lower floor shifts to the battle mode.
Mandatory washroom visits
Washroom is our second home for few days as we love spending most of our time there observing how the tiles on the wall look cleaner, how much you adore the new fragrance of the room freshener you got it from the supermarket, why is the shower head placed facing to the left and not towards the other direction and all the mundane overlooking that never really mattered to you before you got your periods.
Favourite pastime is SELF-PITYING
You are paranoid about every little thing happening in your life right now. The stronger you wearing the supergirl cape otherwise is now adorning the “poor me” crown because all you feel is “I should either slip into a coma for few days and come back to my senses after the world is easy on me” or questions like “Why didn’t he call me to see if I was ok as he knows what I am going through”, “Why is this coffee so hot to drink or why does my skin look swollen as if I am getting older?”, “How can the model promoting the sanitary pad be all smiling, while I am here crawling with pain every hour”. We never leave an opportunity to feel worse about ourselves.
Buckle up girls, next time you do a face-off with the monthly trauma, just sit at home and binge watch Netflix, as this is once in a month leisure space which has to be taken advantage of unabashedly.